America is a junkie hopelessly looking for the next fix. If continents were residents in a methadone clinic, America would be the one stealing your dose and blaming Africa for it. If there is something we can abuse to excess we will get 'er done. Americans are addicted to oil, pills, booze, TV, HD, football, marriage, ... continue reading

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Guys, how many times have you been looking at magazines at the newstand when you hear the uneven breath of a pasty-faced pudge-ball next to you? You look up and see that a yupster is gawking at the newest issue of Big Booty as he unhurriedly looks for his car keys in his pocket. "You freaking pervert," you thin... continue reading

I’m not much of a holiday kind of guy. Christmas seems to bring out the most skeptical side of my nature. Christmas followers have a name for this sort of analytical behavior—Scrooge--they say. Code word for--Jew, but that might just be the anti-X-Mas-side of me talking.

For me, X-mas is the culmination of the Weste... continue reading

You’ve heard of the Indy 500? I’m part of the Jerry 500 - which means I’ve traveled 500 times to see that guy (Garcia) play guitar. But these are the sacrifices one must make when the allurement of a new configuration arises. A price must be paid. Even if you only see your friends every weekend to play poker - mo... continue reading

Diary entry September 2059 (A.B. 37)

“The sun released a plasma blast somewhere in September of 2012. I’m unsure of the exact date--the result was a whitewash of all digitally stored knowledge. The upside is that my student loan disappeared. The downside is so did all my iTunes.”

Barring a cataclysmic event that ... continue reading

What came first - America's obsession with sex or Madison Avenues obsession with money? Hard to say, but what is obvious, is that the pornification of the United States (and the world) is in full swing and nobody rolls like a hardcore G like Obama. True, Obama is a nerdy metrosexual pimp, but a pimp none-the-less. Flyi... continue reading

Creativity and advertising go together like Sarin gas and subways- a noxious ride along the underbelly of capitalist society. Watch one episode of TVs nighttime drama Mad Men, and you get the idea that the only reason creative people get involved in jamming consumer society down the throats of citizens--who only want t... continue reading

Unless we are being completely deceived by everything in the Wall Street Journal, the US and other world markets are teetering on the edge of a chasm of unknown depth. Allusions are made to the “great depression” but in retrospect even that catastrophic moment in America’s rise to King of the Capitalists, might pale in... continue reading

I ran my first business when I was 8 years old, selling lemonade on the side of the road to thirsty suburban passer-bys. In 5th grade I moved into the wonderful world of nudie pens and romance comics that had no actual nudity but reeked of sexual innuendo. 6th grade found me expanding my base with the sale of fireworks... continue reading

Barack Obama galvanized a large slice of the American pie, people who, for a long time, felt disenfranchised. He achieved a miraculous win that seemed to be redemption for people of color and for people who had suffered through 8 years of the Bush’s Big Adventure. For a brief moment, in January of 2009, as seems to hap... continue reading

Western civilization has one great taboo - death. We sweep it under the carpet with all the other dust bunnies in hopes it never mutates into something we will have to fight with a vacuum cleaner that shoots lasers.

I know death well. I spent many long evenings on the ocean floor conversing with the hooded master o... continue reading

I’m not on the Obama train. I’m close enough to the tracks that I can feel the whoosh of the train as it careens by me - my hair gets tousled, my clothes blow back - but onboard, I am not. I believe that the changing of the guard does not constitute a change of course, and so I am unwilling to purchase my ticket. By my... continue reading

What is terrorism? I remember back in 3rd grade there was a kid named Bart who was very threatening. He beat down another kid named Frank in the locker room before we were to play basketball for gym period. He walked with an air of “don’t mess with me.” Based on random beatings we had seen Bart give over the years, we ... continue reading

My father liked to take us on car trips - always leaving at the godforsaken time of 4am - heading north, mostly, and landing, sometimes, in Canada. Pops liked that Canada had few restrictions on fireworks. Every July 4th we would leave the country and go to Canada so the old man could blow off a few rockets.

Sometim... continue reading

1. George Bush goes Bust.

After an agonizing 8 years, America is finally rid of the dim witted tyrant whose idiotic escapade has alienated the US from the rest of the world. For some this end is not so sweet. The Bush family has had their hand in world affairs since the 1950s when Grandpa Bush became a Senator--from... continue reading

If money makes the world go round, prepare for a sudden jolt when it stops. The financial house of cards is getting caught in the crosswind of greed and aces, kings and queens are tumbling all over the planet.

Here in sorta sunny Santa Cruz, there is a pilgrimage down to Esalen and other New Age retreats as hippie/... continue reading

My Dad never really let loose with his thoughts. Every now and then he would launch a bauble of a parable that would either anger or confuse, but in hindsight, have become interesting measuring sticks. It was him I credit with such beaut’s as: “In every women there can be one good thing, your penis,” and “Life is a bur... continue reading

Seeking self-help implies one has a self-problem, and who doesn't? Too shy, too fat, too skinny, too nervous, not artistic enough, too autistic'the list goes on forever--nobody is perfect. Funnyman Jim Carey was depressed most of his adult life. Supermodel Heather Locklear thought she was ugly. Billionaires go to thera... continue reading

With the election finally over, we can turn to the biggest social divider of our lifetime, religion. Like a fairy tale that has all of humanity enchanted, nobody seems to be able to break the 2000-year-old spell. Karl Marx's most quotable line had a simple meaning - religion helps people get through the day (and night)... continue reading

Never before in America have we needed so much from a leader and been happy to accept so little. If I were to apply for a job with Starbucks I would be asked more sensible questions. Someone who met me for a brief moment, like Joe the Plumber, would not be weighing in on what they thought of my character. And once I an... continue reading